How do I file a petition for sole custody?
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From what you’ve described, you can certainly bring a petition to modify custody and request sole legal and physical custody based on a substantial change in circumstances since the original joint custody order. The court will focus on the children’s best interests, and documented evidence of his substance abuse, instability, and failure to exercise parenting time will be highly relevant.
You will want to be sure your filing isn’t just a single document stating “I want sole custody” but instead follows your state’s court-approved format for a motion or petition to modify custody. Most family courts require specific forms—often a petition or motion, an affidavit/declaration in support laying out your facts in detail, and sometimes a proposed parenting plan.
In your declaration, you would clearly outline the history of joint custody, the actual visitation pattern, the June intoxication incident, the children’s lack of contact since then, and any financial neglect. If you have corroboration—such as texts, emails, witnesses, or police reports—it will make your case stronger.
If your only paperwork is something you typed yourself without using the court’s forms, it may get rejected at filing or delayed. You’ll want to check your local family court website or clerk’s office to download the correct forms and instructions. Many jurisdictions also require you to serve the other parent and may set a hearing where both sides can present evidence.
If there is an urgent safety issue, you may be able to request temporary emergency orders at the same time you file for a permanent custody change, but that’s usually reserved for situations with clear, immediate risk to the children.
Because your current order is joint custody without a set visitation schedule, you are asking the court to rewrite that order entirely, so making sure your paperwork is procedurally correct is important. Even if you intend to represent yourself, you might consider having a family law attorney review your forms before filing to be sure they meet your local requirements and present your strongest case.
I hope I was able to help you and answer all of your questions and concerns. Is there any part of my response that you need clarification on or any further information? Did you have any other questions on this subject for me today?
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My ex-husband is an addict (alcohol and drugs), cannot hold a job and cannot hold up his end of visitation. It is supposed to be 50/50, but he was only seeing them about 4 hours a week, on Sunday. In June, he brought them home so drunk that he could hardly walk and they haven’t seen him since.
I’m sorry to hear about the difficult situation you’re facing with your ex-husband and the impact it has on your children. Can you tell me if you have already filed any documents in court regarding custody?
Only what was filed during our divorce.
Have there been any previous court orders or agreements related to custody and visitation that you are currently working with?
Just joint custody but no visitation schedule set.
Is there anything else the Family Lawyer should know before I connect you? Rest assured they’ll be able to help with seeking Sole custody.
I am the primary parent. He can barely pay bills and can’t keep a job, so he doesn’t help financially with anything.
Greetings! I hope this message finds you well. I’m thrilled to have the opportunity to assist you with your situation and provide you with the support you need. Thank you for your patience, and I look forward to working with you.
Thank you!
From what you’ve described, you can certainly bring a petition to modify custody and request sole legal and physical custody based on a substantial change in circumstances since the original joint custody order. The court will focus on the children’s best interests, and documented evidence of his substance abuse, instability, and failure to exercise parenting time will be highly relevant.
You will want to be sure your filing isn’t just a single document stating “I want sole custody” but instead follows your state’s court-approved format for a motion or petition to modify custody. Most family courts require specific forms—often a petition or motion, an affidavit/declaration in support laying out your facts in detail, and sometimes a proposed parenting plan.
In your declaration, you would clearly outline the history of joint custody, the actual visitation pattern, the June intoxication incident, the children’s lack of contact since then, and any financial neglect. If you have corroboration—such as texts, emails, witnesses, or police reports—it will make your case stronger.
If your only paperwork is something you typed yourself without using the court’s forms, it may get rejected at filing or delayed. You’ll want to check your local family court website or clerk’s office to download the correct forms and instructions. Many jurisdictions also require you to serve the other parent and may set a hearing where both sides can present evidence.
If there is an urgent safety issue, you may be able to request temporary emergency orders at the same time you file for a permanent custody change, but that’s usually reserved for situations with clear, immediate risk to the children.
Because your current order is joint custody without a set visitation schedule, you are asking the court to rewrite that order entirely, so making sure your paperwork is procedurally correct is important. Even if you intend to represent yourself, you might consider having a family law attorney review your forms before filing to be sure they meet your local requirements and present your strongest case.
I hope I was able to help you and answer all of your questions and concerns. Is there any part of my response that you need clarification on or any further information? Did you have any other questions on this subject for me today?
Thank you! Is this the case even if he agrees and it isn’t contested?
Meaning do all the steps you mentioned apply?
If he agrees to give you sole custody and the matter is truly uncontested, the process can be much simpler, but you still have to go through the court to make it official. Even when both parents agree, custody orders must be issued by a judge to be legally enforceable, so you can’t just sign a private agreement and call it done.
Most states have a streamlined procedure for this—often called a stipulated modification or agreed order—where you both sign the necessary forms outlining the new arrangement, and then submit them to the court for approval. In many cases, the judge will review the paperwork without requiring a full hearing, as long as it’s clear the agreement serves the children’s best interests.
That said, you will still need to use the court-approved forms and file them with the clerk, and you’ll usually need to provide enough background information for the judge to understand the change in circumstances and why sole custody is appropriate.
The difference with an uncontested case is that you won’t have to gather as much evidence or go through the stress of a contested hearing, but you still have to be precise with the paperwork. In some jurisdictions, you can file a joint stipulation with a proposed order, and the judge will sign off on it relatively quickly. It’s also a good idea to include a detailed parenting plan—even if his time is minimal or supervised—so there’s no confusion later.
Thank you!
You’re very welcome! Thank you so much for your questions! Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to assist you, and please don't hesitate to reach out if you have any further questions or concerns.
