[NJ] How to protect your child from a threatening father before paternity is established?

NJ Family Law

Richard

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I'm sorry to hear about the stress you're experiencing. Let's go through some steps you can take to protect yourself and your child:

Document Everything. Continue to keep detailed records of all interactions with the father, including text messages, emails, and any incidents that occur. This documentation can be crucial if legal action becomes necessary.
Consider a Restraining Order. If the harassment and threats continue, you might consider seeking a restraining order. This can legally prevent the father from contacting you or coming near you and your child. You can file for this at your local family court. In New Jersey, restraining orders are issued under the Prevention of Domestic Violence Act (NJ Rev Stat § 2C:25-17). Harassment is one of the acts that counts as domestic violence. The Act also protects a person who is harassed by someone they have a child in common with, under (NJ Rev Stat § 2C:25-19). The process for filing a complaint is described in (NJ Rev Stat § 2C:25-28).
Establish Legal Custody. Since paternity hasn't been established, you currently have sole custody. However, formalizing this through the court can provide additional legal protection. You can file for custody and request supervised visitation if you believe the father's presence poses a risk to your child. Paternity can be established under the New Jersey Parentage Act (NJ Rev Stat § 9:17-38 et seq.). Custody decisions follow (NJ Rev Stat § 9:2-4), which directs the court to base the arrangement on the child's best interests, including the safety of the child and of each parent.
Seek Legal Advice. Consulting with a family law attorney can provide you with specific guidance tailored to your situation. They can help you understand your rights and the best course of action.
Safety Planning. Develop a safety plan for you and your child. This might include identifying safe places to go in an emergency, having a trusted friend or family member you can call, and ensuring your home is secure.
Consider Mediation. If you feel safe doing so, mediation can be a way to reach an agreement on visitation and other issues without going to court. This can sometimes be less adversarial and stressful.

Please let me know if you have further questions.

New Jersey Custody (Parenting) Plan

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New Jersey, Questions about potential custody issues between parents.

Lexi, Chatbot

I understand that custody issues can be very stressful for parents. Can you please share if there is currently a custody arrangement in place?

No, Paternity has not been established either.

Lexi, Chatbot

Are you seeking to modify an existing custody agreement or are you starting from scratch?

I have general questions, starting from scratch.

Lexi, Chatbot

Is there anything else the Family Lawyer should know before I connect you? Rest assured they'll be able to help with your custody issues.

No.

Richard

Hello. My name is Richard and I have been a licensed attorney for over 25 years and hope to be of assistance. I understand you're dealing with a situation regarding potential custody issues between parents in New Jersey. Just a note, this conversation does not create an attorney-client relationship. I can answer your questions for educational purposes only. Could you tell me more about any specific concerns you have or steps you've taken so far?

I haven't taken any steps. Baby's father continues to threaten to take me to court so I'm just trying to understand what if any options/steps I have.

Richard

Is the baby's father listed on the birth certificate?

No.

Richard

Based on your situation, there are several legal considerations and concepts in New Jersey that could potentially support your case:

Paternity Establishment: Since paternity has not been established, the father does not have legal rights or responsibilities until paternity is legally recognized. This can be done voluntarily or through a court order.
Custody and Visitation Rights: In New Jersey, once paternity is established, the father can seek custody or visitation rights. The court will consider the best interests of the child, including factors like the child's safety, the parents' ability to cooperate, and the child's needs.
Child Support: If paternity is established, the father may be required to provide child support, which is determined based on both parents' incomes and the child's needs.
Legal Custody vs. Physical Custody: Legal custody involves decision-making rights about the child's upbringing, while physical custody pertains to where the child lives. Both can be shared or awarded to one parent.

Let me know if you have any questions or clarifications, if not I'll move forward with guidance.

Thank you, this information is correct with what I've already found online. In the time since I became pregnant, the baby's father has been without stable employment, housing and has struggled with mental health issues and substance use. I just want to protect my child from being put in any dangerous situations.

The father demands to see the baby, and I've so far agreed to short supervised visitations except once when the child was sick. The baby's father continues to threaten and harass me via text message. So I just want to know what I should do to protect myself and my baby.

I've documented everything. I am just tired of feeling coerced into visitations I don't really want to attend and would like to know how to respond to these threats.

Richard

I'm sorry to hear about the stress you're experiencing. Let's go through some steps you can take to protect yourself and your child:

Document Everything. Continue to keep detailed records of all interactions with the father, including text messages, emails, and any incidents that occur. This documentation can be crucial if legal action becomes necessary.
Consider a Restraining Order. If the harassment and threats continue, you might consider seeking a restraining order. This can legally prevent the father from contacting you or coming near you and your child. You can file for this at your local family court. In New Jersey, restraining orders are issued under the Prevention of Domestic Violence Act (NJ Rev Stat § 2C:25-17). Harassment is one of the acts that counts as domestic violence. The Act also protects a person who is harassed by someone they have a child in common with, under (NJ Rev Stat § 2C:25-19). The process for filing a complaint is described in (NJ Rev Stat § 2C:25-28).
Establish Legal Custody. Since paternity hasn't been established, you currently have sole custody. However, formalizing this through the court can provide additional legal protection. You can file for custody and request supervised visitation if you believe the father's presence poses a risk to your child. Paternity can be established under the New Jersey Parentage Act (NJ Rev Stat § 9:17-38 et seq.). Custody decisions follow (NJ Rev Stat § 9:2-4), which directs the court to base the arrangement on the child's best interests, including the safety of the child and of each parent.
Seek Legal Advice. Consulting with a family law attorney can provide you with specific guidance tailored to your situation. They can help you understand your rights and the best course of action.
Safety Planning. Develop a safety plan for you and your child. This might include identifying safe places to go in an emergency, having a trusted friend or family member you can call, and ensuring your home is secure.
Consider Mediation. If you feel safe doing so, mediation can be a way to reach an agreement on visitation and other issues without going to court. This can sometimes be less adversarial and stressful.

Please let me know if you have further questions.

I thought i was talking to a family law attorney, isn't that the point of this website? Also what does formalizing custody through the court.

Richard

I am a family attorney. I just cannot give you legal advice on this website. I can only answer general legal questions for educational purposes only.

Got it, I really don't want to provoke him into establishing paternity. He's still emotionally charged because I asked him to leave. I don't think his motivation is high enough for him to actually take me to court, but he has nothing else going on in his life so he is fixated on this right now.

He has other children that he is not currently trying to see, and he is not paying child support to them either. I am seeking literally nothing from this man, and would like to be left alone.

Richard

I am sorry hear that. If you have any follow up questions, please let me know.

So right now, do nothing until he actually takes me to court?

Richard

Unfortunately. I cannot give direct legal advice on this website as to what you should or should no do but that would certainly be an option.

Thank you.

Richard

I hope I was able to help resolve your issue! If you have any other questions, feel free to ask. Don't hesitate to reach out whenever you need assistance!

Richard

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