Can I take my child on a planned trip without my spouse’s consent if we are still married and she refuses to allow it?

Family Law

Liz

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While married, legally you would both have custody. That would mean that you both have the right to take him on trips. If you took him without her consent, there isn't really anything she could legally do about it, unless you're a risk to the child.

Does she hit you when that happens? She could be charged with domestic violence. That also could be used in custody court, as evidence of her preventing your custody time and possibly being unstable. Have you considered reporting her for domestic violence against you? Physically restraining you and putting your small child between you could be seen as violence towards him as well. (34 U.S.C. § 12291(a)(12)

Nothing can really be done until a separation or divorce is filed. Then, legal custody rights could be worked out.

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My mother planned and already paid for a family vacation that is happening in October, and my wife, son, and I already planned to go. It is non refundable, and it is a trip that our 4 year old son is really looking forward to.

Due to some major issues that my wife and I are having right now, my wife decided to declare that she and our son are no longer going on the trip. Is there anything I can do to still go on the vacation with our son without my wife stopping me? She will try to physically prevent me from taking our son on the trip. And she will not allow me to take our son anywhere without her.

Lexi, Chatbot

I understand how difficult this situation must be for you, especially with your son looking forward to the trip. Have you and your wife discussed the vacation together to see if there's a way to come to an agreement?

She refuses to discuss it further and allow me to take our son on the trip, and she won't go either.

Lexi, Chatbot

Are there any existing custody arrangements or legal agreements in place regarding travel with your son?

No.

Lexi, Chatbot

Is there anything else the family lawyer should know before I connect you? Rest assured they'll be able to help with your travel concerns.

No.

Liz

Hi there! My name is Liz and I’ve been an attorney for more than a decade, and I am here to assist with your legal concerns.

So I can best help, does your son already have his passport?

No, we are not going out of state or flying, just driving. I mean we are driving to another state.

Liz

Thanks for clarifying that you're driving. Did your wife give any reason for not going?

We are having major issues in the marriage, and she is making a lot of threats with divorce, making false accusations about me, refusing to let me take my son anywhere without her, verbally abusing me, and trying to control many aspects of my life. She is also planning to take him on a separate trip without me.

Liz

I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through such a tough time. It sounds incredibly stressful. Could you let me know which state you're currently living in? This will help me understand the legal framework that applies to your situation.

She will physically try to stop me and hold or pull him away from me. Is there anything I can do to prevent her from doing that? I haven't had an opportunity to take him without her approval yet, but she has defiantly stated that I am not allowed to take him anywhere alone.

I'm not sure how I'm going to stop her from intervening and keeping him from me. I already have recordings of her verbal abuse to me.

Liz

Nothing can really be done until a separation or divorce is filed. Then, legal custody rights could be worked out.

Putting our son through that also might be a challenge, because he might not listen to me or express not wanting to go with me if my wife tries to stop him from going.

Liz

That could also be seen as alienation of the child from you. Legally, she can't actually enforce that without a court order. You both would have the right to possess and spend time with the child.

So what would be my best course of action as of now if separation or divorce is not filed yet?

Liz

You could continue documenting things so that you have a record for court. If you want to stay married, you could also suggest an option such as marriage counseling.

I've already suggested counseling. She is refusing. She is showing a lot of signs of narcissism.

Liz

Have you considered hiring a local attorney?

But there are no issues with traveling across state lines regarding this?

Liz

As you both have full custody, you both could travel at any time until there is an order.

I hope I was able to help with your situation! If you have any other questions, feel free to ask.

Liz

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